Finally, in Ephesians 4:29 Paul commands that our verbal communication always be purposeful, and the right purpose is "that we may give grace to those who hear." The biblical purpose for every conversation you have, in every personal interaction, is that the person who hears you will receive grace.
We're all in need of grace. There's no one you konw who doesn't need more of it. And God has so composed His church that when we're together in a larger corporate gathering or in a small group or even in casual conversation, we can receive grace and communicate grace through the exchange of edifying and appropriate words.
Every conversation has this potential. So let us pray, "Lord help me discern what kind of grace this person needs." For those who are legalistic or feel condemned, we want to bring justifying grace into their souls. To those struggling with a besetting sin, we want to bring sanctifying grace. To those experiencing suffering, we want to bring comforting grace. To those who are just weary, we want to refresh their souls with sustaining grace. The list goes on and on.
Through each and every interaction, however casual, however brief, I want to impart grace through my words, for that's God's purpose in granting us this gift of speech. And in effect we have God's promise in this passage that when our words are edifying and appropriate, they
will
have grace.
So we have to ask ourselves: Is this the effect of my speech upon others? Is this their common experience in our conversations? Do they experience grace in and through my words?
-from Humility: True Greatness by C.J. Mahaney
I cannot express in words the way this book has encouraged my heart. I highly, highly recommend reading it!